This was my christmas with the kids. After opening presents we all sat down to play a few games of Yatzee. Katelyn was playing on the computer. We all had a wonderful time and I"m glad it was just me, the kids, Grandma and Grandpa.

Wednesday Visitation

so don kept his wednesday visitation, and took Andrew from 5:30 to 8:30pm. Of course Katelyn didnt go again even though she did not have church, she still has no desire to be near her father. Don is still planning on spending time with friends this friday night instead of taking the kids on his regular scheduled weekend. Its New Year's Eve so he has more of a priority to spend time with friends and go out and drink then to stay at home with his children and spend time with them. His plan is to take Andrew at normal time at 6 and bring him home around 9 so that he can go out. One other thing I would like to note is that on Christmas Eve, he had some new girlfriend,Monica, come out to his house and spend Christmas Eve with him and the kids, even though the kids didn't even know her. Christmas Eve was the first night the kids had even met her. I think this should have been a time with the kids and not with a total stranger. When Don is dating someone, he tends to push the kids aside and the woman becomes more important than his children. This is the reason he is in and out of the kids' lives. He has dated more people than I can keep track of. Just at Thanksgiving he was dating some other chick whose kids went to school with Andrew. Now it's someone else. So on the most important holiday that is supposed to be for the kids, he invites a stranger over to the kids to celebrate the holiday with them.

Court Issues

So as most of you know, I requested to the court that the kids and I be able to move to Gillette Wyoming. This is where my family is and I could make double the money what I am making here in Kansas. Don (the kids' dad) has not been in there life much as he was never much of a father to them and still is not. I was married to Don for 7 years and together for 9. During our marriage, Don was very abusive physically, emotionally and sexually. After we divorced I had several protection from abuse orders against him as I feared my life. He broke into my house after we split and the cops were called once again. This was a very bad time in my life which I never want to relive or experience again in my life. Thank God my kids were little and don't remember a lot of the abuse to me or to them. When we went to court in 2004, the Guardian Ad Litem responded saying Don needed parenting classes and Anger Management classes so his kids do not fear him. The cops were called on Don several times after our divorce because he was abusing the children. Particularly Kodi who is the oldest and not Don's biological child. Kodi and Don's relationship went downhill after that and Kodi refused to go see Don for several years. Last year, Katelyn (Don's oldest biological child) had a falling out over something stupid, however, this is the way Don is. Don was dating some chick with kids which he took to school every morning and had to pass our house on his way. He got upset with Katelyn because at the age of 13 she wanted to spend a weekend with her friends instead of him. He yelled and screamed at her for over 30 minutes telling her she was worthless and uncaring and said he would never help her out again with cheerleading, softball, or anything else she wanted to do. He also told her she could walk to school that he would not stop to pick her up anymore(which he has since never taken her to school since that day). Mind you he was still transporting his girlfriends daughter to the same school my daughter attended and had to go right pass our house to get there. This was the end of the relationship of Katelyn and her father. Oh one other note about this incident. Katelyn told her dad that she was upset with the fact that he moved this girlfriend into his house and let her kids take over katelyns room so she had no where to sleep or spend her own quiet time while she was visiting at his house. This made Katelyn feel as if her dad pushed her to the side while he put this other woman's kids first. As far as the relationship goes with her father now, it is pretty much non-existant even though I have offered Don and Katelyn many options to get there relationship on track. I have always encouraged a relationship with their father. Unfortunately we do not get to pick our dads, as I too had a rough childhood even though I was very close to my dad and he loved us very much, he began to drink and choose alcohol over his children and to this day he still does. My dad was a very loving and fun person when he was sober but he is a very different person drunk and I dont even consider him my dad when he's drinking. He is a stranger to me when he is drunk. I want my kids to have some kind of relationship with their father even though he is not the best person in the world and even though he tends to treat them badly. I think as they get older and after they turn 18 they will make their own opinion of their father and will decide what if any relationship they want to have with him. Until then I support them in whatever they decide and encourage some kind of relationship with him. Andrew is my youngest, he is 11 and while his relationship with his dad is okay, he is constantly disappointed by his father promising he will take him somewhere or promising extra time with him and he doesn't show up. He is almost to the same age where Don destroyed his relationship with Katelyn and Kodi so I am now prepared to have another very hurt and disappointed child in about another year if not sooner. So there is a little background, now on to what is going on now. I'm going to write as often as I need to 1) to help keep track of what Don does or doesn't do. 2) to help keep track of the kids' feelings and visitation with their dad and 3) to help keep track of what harrassment I have to go through to encourage the relationship all for the purpose of going back to court and requesting the move to wyoming again.
So in August I requested the courts to allow me to move out of state to Wyoming. We went through a hearing where  the judge requested us to talk to a Guardian ad Litem who was connie Steineger. While she only spent 30 minutes total with each one of us, I think she made unfair assumptions and did not take into account the entire picture of Don and what he has done or hasn't done. When we went to court in 2006 another GAL said don needed counseling, anger management and parenting classes which he never did do any of it. He has ignored all court orders since we divorced and I just dont understand how a judge or anyone will let him get away with not taking care of his kids but allowing him to stop us from bettering our lives. As we testified in court Don stated under oath that the only reason he wants me to stay here is because he wants to watch me. He went to my apartment and took court papers addressed to me off my door, was asking around at my complex things about me that was none of his business. This scared me. During the wait time between hearings, he would come into my workplace daily to harrass me. this also scared me and since the last hearing i have had my boss ban him from the store i work at while I am working for my safety. If he had gone to court and said he wanted the kids to stay here to spend time with them, I would understand why the judge wouldnt let me move but because he said he wanted to watch me, freaks me out. It baffles me that the judge would allow this to happen. Thank God I'm living with my mom at this time. So at the hearing and in the GAL's report, Connie (GAL) dogged me to no end in her report, maybe Don was sleeping with her, I dont know what happened but he lies so much and can talk a lot of bullshit that she hardly mentioned Don in her report, nothing about Don not visiting his children, not helping his children, not paying the medical like he is supposed to, nothing about his abuse history with me and the kids, nothing, none of that was brought up in her report. I totally did not understand it and neither did my attorney. So the judge decides to tell him he has one more shot at parenting, come on he's had 14 years and has yet to parent or be responsible for his children, he gets another chance. what the hell? And now, by the judge giving him another chance, he is even more sure he can control my life and everything i do without the responsibilities of taking care of his children. They have ordered us to go to some parenting thing down in Newton. Remember, I work a full time job, care for 3 children, and go to school full time. The GAL and Judge both knows this and yet they want us to take time out to take parenting classes. I ran daycare for 7 years. I have taken every parenting class out there there is to take. Ok now to the great part. They want us to take this class together, (HELLO THIS MAN ABUSED ME FOR 9 YEARS I HAVE NO DESIRE TO SIT DOWN IN THE SAME ROOM AS HIM AT ANYTIME IN MY LIFE EVER AGAIN.) I Hate him for what he has done to me and my children. I have worked my ass off to get out of that marriage and away from him and in no way will i ever feel comfortable taking a class and sitting in the same room as him. The next thing is it's 115 dollars a week. Come on, I dont even make a 115 a week. how do they think i can afford this when they made me lose a 16 dollar an hour job which is twice as much as what i make here by not allowing me to move to wyoming. THIS SUCKS. I would do anything for my children except sit in the same room with their father who will only put me down, call me names, and gloat at the fact that he stopped me from moving and is now costing me all this money. I really believe that he will never show up for these classes. However, I am afraid that i will pay this high amount of money which could be going for clothes for the kids or anything they else they need. which normally i have nothing left over after bills to afford much of anything else and if i do i spend all my extra money getting the kids clothes and shoes and whatever else they need. How do they expect me to afford this? Lets not make Don pay for this since he started all this and he is the one who has never taken a parenting class and he is the one who does not know how to parent his kids. This is really a bunch of bullshit and has really taken a lot away from my kids. I will get through it and will work harder or extra hours to give my kids what they need but why should i be punished for what Don has not done in the past or can not do yet today. Why should I fork out more money when I have already done every parenting class out there and then some. and parent my kids on a daily basis. I am a GOOD MOTHER  and no  matter what anyone says, I will always be a good mother no matter what anyone does to try to put me down and accuse me of not being a good mother. NO ONE WILL TAKE MY CONFIDENCE AWAY IN PARENTING AND LOVING MY CHILDREN. i will write more tomorrow as don is supposed to have visitation tonight.