Monday, May 16, 2011
Don and Katelyn May 16, 2011
So we went back to court on April 30th and Don and i both testified about what had happened since we were last in court. Of course I was truthful about the meetings i tried to set up with Don and Katelyn and how he never showed and how i offered many times with her that he refused or denied. Then of course don testified that i lied about everything and how i was to blame for his relationship with katelyn and i never notified him of those meetings. I think the judge finally saw through him and decided that he wanted to talk to Katelyn herself off the record so that neither parent (looking at don) could pull that tape and use it against her about what she may of said about either parent. So he met with Katelyn a week later and said she was a fine young lady. Katelyn told me that she thought if the judge were to take sides he would take mine and that he was probably gonna order counseling for the 2 of them. I didnt ask what all she said but she offered some information of how it went. This past Saturday I got the letter from my attorney saying all over night visits were to be suspended and Don and Katelyn were to do counseling with Sandy Barker with Veridion and that Don is to pay for all of it. LOL I highly doubt that's gonna happen. It also said the judge didnt believe that i was doing anything to hinder the relationship between don and katelyn which finally made me feel good., He can no longer blame me, not that he wont try but if he does the judge will see through it especially when it happens with Andrew also. So the very first time after court was over that Katelyn had her spring concert and don no shows. Imagine that. he knew things were not going his way and he no shows to her concert. I will bet he never shows again to one now nor will he go to parent teacher conferences for her. If things dont go his way he wants nothing to do with it. We will see but i doubt he will be there for her at all now. I will let you know in a few weeks.
Saturday, April 9, 2011
Catching up
So i havent written in a while but things have gone ok. i stopped all text messages to Don. If he needs to talk to me he has to call or email. there has been a couple but nothing like it has been. I talked to my attorney about stopping don from calling the cops and he sent an email to his attorney and suprisingly he hasn't called the cops since. He threatened because Friday April 8th he said he couldn't take the kids to school because he was sick so i told him if he was that sick he didnt need to take the kids. However, i was home and when i asked how he was feeling when he came by he got defensive and started yelling at me. I swear i'm nice and he turns into a fucking ass. I get sick of it. Why can't we just be 2 normal divorced people who get along and can have a normal conversation. it doesnt matter if i am nice or not he is a complete ass, yelling at me and putting me down constantly. UMM who's the one who feeds and clothes the kids, rasises them on my own, pays for all doctor bills and medicine. UMM that would be me. Plus i go to school, work and run the kids to all the places they need to be. NO help from him. He is more than a deadbeat. taking your kids once in a great while doesnt make u a father. Oh well i can't win so i just give up with him.
i was very suprised he didn't call the cops this past week. I told him since he had the kids come out and fish after i told him no they couldn't because we had plans but he didnt care so the kids were out there all day sunday so i told him since that's my only day with tthe kids and he took that away from me then he was using that day as his weekday with the kids. he never called the police so i guess it was fine. he did try to say it was his makeup time when we were on vacation but i told him in january he needed to make up that time before we left and he never did, so he missed out on that time because he had 3 months to make up time and he never did.
So we go back to court on April 29th and i hope he burns in hell and the judge sees him as the idiot and unresponsible parent he really is now. i wish the kids were 18 now so i could just move on without ever seeing or talking to him again in my life. i wish i could move to wyoming right now and leave this life behind me for good. the farther away i am from him the better and i kick myself everyday for moving back here. it was the stupidist move i have ever made. just made it impossible being there at the time because of Jon's stupid games against me. Oh well can't change it now just gotta make the best of it.
i was very suprised he didn't call the cops this past week. I told him since he had the kids come out and fish after i told him no they couldn't because we had plans but he didnt care so the kids were out there all day sunday so i told him since that's my only day with tthe kids and he took that away from me then he was using that day as his weekday with the kids. he never called the police so i guess it was fine. he did try to say it was his makeup time when we were on vacation but i told him in january he needed to make up that time before we left and he never did, so he missed out on that time because he had 3 months to make up time and he never did.
So we go back to court on April 29th and i hope he burns in hell and the judge sees him as the idiot and unresponsible parent he really is now. i wish the kids were 18 now so i could just move on without ever seeing or talking to him again in my life. i wish i could move to wyoming right now and leave this life behind me for good. the farther away i am from him the better and i kick myself everyday for moving back here. it was the stupidist move i have ever made. just made it impossible being there at the time because of Jon's stupid games against me. Oh well can't change it now just gotta make the best of it.
Friday, April 1, 2011
March 22 2011
spring break
notified don back in january that we would be on vacation from the 19th until the 27th and because we were gonna be gone all week that he would have to make up his visitation time with the kids prior to our vacation which he never has done. plans changed and we were leaving on the 23rd instead of the 19th, so don asked if he could see the kids and i said yes as long as u pick them up, my cars in the shop and i have to pack and do laundry ect. He said he would pick them up and i would have to come get them. when i told him again i couldnt because i didnt have a vehicle and still had tons to do, he got mad and started yelling at me about how i'm supposed to do certain things and take on my responsibility. i said well if u want to see them u can but technically you were not gonna have them at all this week anyway, so i am being nice by letting u pick them up at all. I got off the phone with him because i was not gonna listen him
notified don back in january that we would be on vacation from the 19th until the 27th and because we were gonna be gone all week that he would have to make up his visitation time with the kids prior to our vacation which he never has done. plans changed and we were leaving on the 23rd instead of the 19th, so don asked if he could see the kids and i said yes as long as u pick them up, my cars in the shop and i have to pack and do laundry ect. He said he would pick them up and i would have to come get them. when i told him again i couldnt because i didnt have a vehicle and still had tons to do, he got mad and started yelling at me about how i'm supposed to do certain things and take on my responsibility. i said well if u want to see them u can but technically you were not gonna have them at all this week anyway, so i am being nice by letting u pick them up at all. I got off the phone with him because i was not gonna listen him
Sunday, March 13, 2011
Cops called again for visitation issue
March 11,2011
So it's Don's visitation weekend again and Katelyn refused to go again despite me telling her that she needs to spend time with her dad, although she has been sick all week as Andrew was last week and Don made an agreement with Andrew that because he was sick he would not take him for visitation so he could get well. When Don decides not to take Andrew, he doesnt even discuss or ask Katelyn if she wants to do something or spend time with him. If Andrew doesn't go with his Dad, Don doesnt complain about Katelyn not going, in fact I offered time with Katelyn on March 3 which was a wednesday night, since Andrew was sick I thought it was a good opportunity for him to spend one on one time with Katelyn, so I asked him if he was in town which he said he wasnt but then i asked if he would like to come in and spend a little time with Katelyn taking her shopping to finish getting ready for the ski trip. He said he was not coming into town until his workplace called saying his check was ready to be picked up. He knew Katelyn had Youth group which I said she could be a little late and I would take her to target so he wouldnt have to drive all the way into town and that would give them an hour to shop and spend time together and then he could drop her off at youth group. It was more important to sit at home and wait for his paycheck then to come in and spend an hour with his daughter. I dont understand why he couldnt meet Katelyn at Target and shop with her while he waited for his check. It just doesnt make any sense to me but then when she doesnt want to go for a weekend visitation he gets mad and calls the cops on her. But when you think about it, if he's showing her he doesnt care about her and doesnt want to spend time with her, then i guess you can understand that she feels like he doesnt care to spend time with her when we offer or she wants to so why should she care to spend time with him when he wants her too. Its a lot of MENTAL ABUSE, JUST LIKE HE WAS AND STILL IS WITH ME. I GUESS IT'S BECAUSE SHE'S A GIRL, HE MENTALLY ABUSES EVERY GIRL HE KNOWS INCLUDING HIS OWN DAUGHTER. HOWEVER, HE DOES MENTALLY ABUSE HIS SON ALSO. I WANT IT TO STOP. I HOPE THE JUDGE WILL MAKE HIM STOP MENTALLY ABUSING THE KIDS AND GET HELP SO THE KIDS ARE NOT SCARED OF HIM ANYMORE.
Kodi no longer goes out to Don's because of what don has done in the past few months. my kids are very protective of me especially kodi and when someone tries to hurt me, my kids protect me especially kodi.
So back to tonight, when katelyn told don she didnt want to go and wasn't going he called the cops again. when they finally showed up, i showed the cops the copies of emails and text messages of the many times i have set up lunch dates with katelyn where don has not showed up. I also explained to the officer that Katelyn has not been to his house in 2 years except for christmas eve. Don tends to lie to get people to take his side not telling them the whole story, just like with all the letters from my attorney that came from his attorney where his attorney says i'm not doing anything to force visitation when in fact i have by setting up lunch dates. he doesnt tell his attorney that i have set up meetings and encouraged katelyn to meet him and to build a relationship with her father, however when he doesnt show up it's hard for her to build that relationship. He's always lying about things like that because he wants to look good and make me look bad, but when his attorney sees all this in court she will be shocked that he has lied all this time. Just like when he lied to the police. They spoke with Katelyn alone in her room and as i heard some of it i didnt hear everything but did hear him ask what happened with her dad and she told him that she wasnt allowed at his house for a while, something even i wasn't aware that he had said to her. The officer asked if she wanted a relationship with her dad and she said not really, when he asked if she was willing to try to get to know her dad she said she didnt really want to but he got her to say maybe. She told the officer that she was sick and didnt feel up to going and he asked if she went to school which in fact she had missed most of the week due to being sick and running a fever again thursday night which is why i had to keep her home again friday. she did she a dr last week which the dr ordered her to stay home for 3 days, she tried to go back to school on thursday which was not a good idea because she ended up with a fever again friday. I have made her stay in all weekend and will only be allowed to go to church on sunday. after the officer spoke with me again, he went out to tell don he was not forcing her to go with him and I was able to talk katelyn into another lunch date with her dad which we set up with the officer so that i had a witness to setting up another meeting. When he asked don if he could meet us at 1215 Sunday for lunch with his daughter at mcdonalds on planet ave which i heard him tell don all this, don said that he needed a reminder text. I told the officer "dont you think if his daughter was important to him that he would remember a lunch date 2 days later. not like its a month away. The officer agreed that if he really wanted a relationship with katelyn that he would remember and he would do anything including "crawling through glass to see his kids". I agreed to send a reminder text even though i felt that was not my responsibility to remind him. I was going to be the bigger person.
So today, March 12,2011 at approx 6 pm, I sent him a reminder text saying lunch with katelyn tomorrow. He's always trying to start shit with me so he said i need to know where and what time and i said exactly what we set up with the cops last night. then he had to throw "your being uncooperative thanks for showing me that your unwilling" WHAT EVER JEEZ I CANT WIN. I sent a reminder text what does he want me to do go pick him up and take him to meet her because he can't remember because she is not important to him. do i have to force him to show up. holy crap its just so old being put down all the time no matter how hard i try to be nice. its so hard to be nice to someone like that. i told him that i was doing more than i even should be doing by reminding you, i didnt have to do that at all, but i did. then he tried to say that the cops never told him where or what time. ANOTHER LIE I HEARD THE COPS TELL HIM 1215 AT MCDONALDS ON PLANET AVE. WELL GUESS WE WILL SEE IF HE SHOWS UP TOMORROW. I HIGHLY DOUBT HE WILL. HE PROBABLY DOESNT REMEMBER WHAT TIME EVEN THOUGH I REMINDED HIM AGAIN TONIGHT. I ALSO SENT AN EMAIL WITH ALL THE DETAILS.
WE GO BACK TO COURT ON MONDAY, I'M ACTUALLY EXCITED TO SEE WHAT THE JUDGE THINKS WHEN HE HEARS EVERYTHING I'VE DONE AND REALIZES ALL THE LIES DON HAS TOLD SINCE COURT IN DECEMBER AND TO SEE THE LOOK ON HIS ATTORNEY'S FACE WILL BE PRICELESS.
SHE PROBABLY DOESNT EVEN KNOW THAT THE FIRST WEEKEND HE WAS SUPPOSED TO HAVE THE KIDS AFTER THE LAST COURT HEARING WHEN THE JUDGE TOLD HIM HE COULDNT GO OUT AND HAVE FUN THAT HE HAD KIDS NOW AND THEY WERE TO COME FIRST, HE DROPPED THEM OFF WITH ME AFTER SPENDING ONE HOUR WITH THEM ON DECEMBER 31ST, SO THAT HE COULD GO OUT FOR NEW YEARS EVE. HE DIDNT WANT THEM LIKE HE SAID HE DID IN COURT. I'M THINKING THE JUDGE WONT LIKE THAT AT ALL. I ONLY PRAY HE SEES AND HEARS EVERYTHING THAT DON HAS SCREWED UP SINCE DECEMBER 20TH 2010.
OH ONE MORE THING, DON DIDNT SHOW UP TO TAKE THE KIDS TO SCHOOL THURSDAY MORNING SO I HAD TO TAKE THEM TO SCHOOL. I RECIEVED A TEXT AT 800AM SAYING HE FELL ASLEEP ON THE COUCH AND NEVER HEARD ANYTHING FROM ANDREW. ALWAYS BLAMING HIS SCREW UPS ON OTHER PEOPLE WHETHER ITS ME OR HIS KIDS. IT WAS ANDREWS FAULT HE DIDNT GET UP TO TAKE THE KIDS TO SCHOOL. ITS NOT ANDREWS RESPONSIBILITY, ITS DON'S. HE KNOWS HE HAS TO TAKE THEM TO SCHOOL EVERY THURSDAY AND FRIDAY AND HE BLAMES ANDREW. WOW HE IS SOMETHING ELSE.
WELL I WILL WRITE TOMORROW ABOUT VISITATION WITH KATELYN IF HE SHOWS UP.
So it's Don's visitation weekend again and Katelyn refused to go again despite me telling her that she needs to spend time with her dad, although she has been sick all week as Andrew was last week and Don made an agreement with Andrew that because he was sick he would not take him for visitation so he could get well. When Don decides not to take Andrew, he doesnt even discuss or ask Katelyn if she wants to do something or spend time with him. If Andrew doesn't go with his Dad, Don doesnt complain about Katelyn not going, in fact I offered time with Katelyn on March 3 which was a wednesday night, since Andrew was sick I thought it was a good opportunity for him to spend one on one time with Katelyn, so I asked him if he was in town which he said he wasnt but then i asked if he would like to come in and spend a little time with Katelyn taking her shopping to finish getting ready for the ski trip. He said he was not coming into town until his workplace called saying his check was ready to be picked up. He knew Katelyn had Youth group which I said she could be a little late and I would take her to target so he wouldnt have to drive all the way into town and that would give them an hour to shop and spend time together and then he could drop her off at youth group. It was more important to sit at home and wait for his paycheck then to come in and spend an hour with his daughter. I dont understand why he couldnt meet Katelyn at Target and shop with her while he waited for his check. It just doesnt make any sense to me but then when she doesnt want to go for a weekend visitation he gets mad and calls the cops on her. But when you think about it, if he's showing her he doesnt care about her and doesnt want to spend time with her, then i guess you can understand that she feels like he doesnt care to spend time with her when we offer or she wants to so why should she care to spend time with him when he wants her too. Its a lot of MENTAL ABUSE, JUST LIKE HE WAS AND STILL IS WITH ME. I GUESS IT'S BECAUSE SHE'S A GIRL, HE MENTALLY ABUSES EVERY GIRL HE KNOWS INCLUDING HIS OWN DAUGHTER. HOWEVER, HE DOES MENTALLY ABUSE HIS SON ALSO. I WANT IT TO STOP. I HOPE THE JUDGE WILL MAKE HIM STOP MENTALLY ABUSING THE KIDS AND GET HELP SO THE KIDS ARE NOT SCARED OF HIM ANYMORE.
Kodi no longer goes out to Don's because of what don has done in the past few months. my kids are very protective of me especially kodi and when someone tries to hurt me, my kids protect me especially kodi.
So back to tonight, when katelyn told don she didnt want to go and wasn't going he called the cops again. when they finally showed up, i showed the cops the copies of emails and text messages of the many times i have set up lunch dates with katelyn where don has not showed up. I also explained to the officer that Katelyn has not been to his house in 2 years except for christmas eve. Don tends to lie to get people to take his side not telling them the whole story, just like with all the letters from my attorney that came from his attorney where his attorney says i'm not doing anything to force visitation when in fact i have by setting up lunch dates. he doesnt tell his attorney that i have set up meetings and encouraged katelyn to meet him and to build a relationship with her father, however when he doesnt show up it's hard for her to build that relationship. He's always lying about things like that because he wants to look good and make me look bad, but when his attorney sees all this in court she will be shocked that he has lied all this time. Just like when he lied to the police. They spoke with Katelyn alone in her room and as i heard some of it i didnt hear everything but did hear him ask what happened with her dad and she told him that she wasnt allowed at his house for a while, something even i wasn't aware that he had said to her. The officer asked if she wanted a relationship with her dad and she said not really, when he asked if she was willing to try to get to know her dad she said she didnt really want to but he got her to say maybe. She told the officer that she was sick and didnt feel up to going and he asked if she went to school which in fact she had missed most of the week due to being sick and running a fever again thursday night which is why i had to keep her home again friday. she did she a dr last week which the dr ordered her to stay home for 3 days, she tried to go back to school on thursday which was not a good idea because she ended up with a fever again friday. I have made her stay in all weekend and will only be allowed to go to church on sunday. after the officer spoke with me again, he went out to tell don he was not forcing her to go with him and I was able to talk katelyn into another lunch date with her dad which we set up with the officer so that i had a witness to setting up another meeting. When he asked don if he could meet us at 1215 Sunday for lunch with his daughter at mcdonalds on planet ave which i heard him tell don all this, don said that he needed a reminder text. I told the officer "dont you think if his daughter was important to him that he would remember a lunch date 2 days later. not like its a month away. The officer agreed that if he really wanted a relationship with katelyn that he would remember and he would do anything including "crawling through glass to see his kids". I agreed to send a reminder text even though i felt that was not my responsibility to remind him. I was going to be the bigger person.
So today, March 12,2011 at approx 6 pm, I sent him a reminder text saying lunch with katelyn tomorrow. He's always trying to start shit with me so he said i need to know where and what time and i said exactly what we set up with the cops last night. then he had to throw "your being uncooperative thanks for showing me that your unwilling" WHAT EVER JEEZ I CANT WIN. I sent a reminder text what does he want me to do go pick him up and take him to meet her because he can't remember because she is not important to him. do i have to force him to show up. holy crap its just so old being put down all the time no matter how hard i try to be nice. its so hard to be nice to someone like that. i told him that i was doing more than i even should be doing by reminding you, i didnt have to do that at all, but i did. then he tried to say that the cops never told him where or what time. ANOTHER LIE I HEARD THE COPS TELL HIM 1215 AT MCDONALDS ON PLANET AVE. WELL GUESS WE WILL SEE IF HE SHOWS UP TOMORROW. I HIGHLY DOUBT HE WILL. HE PROBABLY DOESNT REMEMBER WHAT TIME EVEN THOUGH I REMINDED HIM AGAIN TONIGHT. I ALSO SENT AN EMAIL WITH ALL THE DETAILS.
WE GO BACK TO COURT ON MONDAY, I'M ACTUALLY EXCITED TO SEE WHAT THE JUDGE THINKS WHEN HE HEARS EVERYTHING I'VE DONE AND REALIZES ALL THE LIES DON HAS TOLD SINCE COURT IN DECEMBER AND TO SEE THE LOOK ON HIS ATTORNEY'S FACE WILL BE PRICELESS.
SHE PROBABLY DOESNT EVEN KNOW THAT THE FIRST WEEKEND HE WAS SUPPOSED TO HAVE THE KIDS AFTER THE LAST COURT HEARING WHEN THE JUDGE TOLD HIM HE COULDNT GO OUT AND HAVE FUN THAT HE HAD KIDS NOW AND THEY WERE TO COME FIRST, HE DROPPED THEM OFF WITH ME AFTER SPENDING ONE HOUR WITH THEM ON DECEMBER 31ST, SO THAT HE COULD GO OUT FOR NEW YEARS EVE. HE DIDNT WANT THEM LIKE HE SAID HE DID IN COURT. I'M THINKING THE JUDGE WONT LIKE THAT AT ALL. I ONLY PRAY HE SEES AND HEARS EVERYTHING THAT DON HAS SCREWED UP SINCE DECEMBER 20TH 2010.
OH ONE MORE THING, DON DIDNT SHOW UP TO TAKE THE KIDS TO SCHOOL THURSDAY MORNING SO I HAD TO TAKE THEM TO SCHOOL. I RECIEVED A TEXT AT 800AM SAYING HE FELL ASLEEP ON THE COUCH AND NEVER HEARD ANYTHING FROM ANDREW. ALWAYS BLAMING HIS SCREW UPS ON OTHER PEOPLE WHETHER ITS ME OR HIS KIDS. IT WAS ANDREWS FAULT HE DIDNT GET UP TO TAKE THE KIDS TO SCHOOL. ITS NOT ANDREWS RESPONSIBILITY, ITS DON'S. HE KNOWS HE HAS TO TAKE THEM TO SCHOOL EVERY THURSDAY AND FRIDAY AND HE BLAMES ANDREW. WOW HE IS SOMETHING ELSE.
WELL I WILL WRITE TOMORROW ABOUT VISITATION WITH KATELYN IF HE SHOWS UP.
Continued Feb 25th post More visitation issues
Don told the kids and me after the kids decided they didnt want to go out to his house for visitation thursday Feb. 24th that I should prepare that he was no longer going to be taking the kids to school on Thursday and Fridays because they would not come out and visit. he was no longer going to help them or me until they could go visit him. I told Don that it didn't matter to me, that it doesn't hurt me by him not taking them to school because i can take them every morning, but that he was hurting the kids by denying them an opportunity to spend time with their dad 2 mornings a week. He tries so hard to hurt me but doesnt realize that he hurts the kids in the process. How do you think it makes the kids feel that their dad doesnt want to help them or see them 2 extra days a week? I know if i was in their shoes i would hurt because even as their mother I hurt for them. Everytime he hurts them, he does hurt me because my heart goes out to them as I feel their pain. They are such special kids and I love them so much. I Thank God everyday for giving me a chance to be with my kids, to be able to spend as much time with them as possible. I have offered Don so much extra time with the kids even opening up my home, (even though I dont want him at my house or around me), so that he can stop by any extra time he has to spend some extra time with the kids, especially if they decide they dont want to go to his house for one night, but he proves over and over again that he doesnt want any extra time with them. He complains if I ask if he can watch the kids or stop by and check on Andrew or Katelyn if they happen to be sick saying it's not his weekend. I want things to be different, I want the kids to be able to go out to their dads any day of the week or weekend instead of just having one set night. I want Don to want that too if we continue to live in Kansas. If they dont want to go on Thursday, I want Don to respect that and say to his kids "OK lets do something tomorrow night or the next night or next night whatever works" He is welcome to take the kids whenever he wants to even if its not his weekend or weekday. I have told him that he is welcome to take the kids any day of the week, anytime as long as we dont have plans.
Tuesday, March 1, 2011
More visitation issues
Friday Feb 25 2011
Don shows up at 615 to pick the kids up for his weekend. both the kids go out to his car to talk to him and to let him know they don't want to go with him. It was taking a long time so i finally went outside to see what was going on. Don was badgering them and yelling at them about going with him. They both repeatedly said they didn't want to go. Again, Katelyn hasn't been to her dads house for a weekend in years. To stop the yelling and arguing back and forth, I told the kids that if they were going with me (as i had to leave), then they needed to get in the car. After another few choice words by don he then said i will be by tomorow to pick you guys up. Saturday between 3 and 6 pm. they were both home at the time he came by around 315. I wasn't home, as i was working. He brought the Salina PD with them. I wasn't here to hear what was said or done but all i know is kodi said that don told the kids that if they didnt go with him i was going to jail. kodi came by my work to tell me that. Andrew went with him but katelyn still wouldnt go. So i told don by scaring the kids into going with him was not the answer to the problem that it was only going to make the situation worse. That he needed to grow up and find a different way to deal with this issue. you know we shouldn't have to wait at the house for 3 hours for him to show up to pick the kids up in the first place but we did. I made sure the kids were to stay home until dad showed up to pick them up. I went above and beyond what i need to do to make sure the kids are home at pickup time. So andrew goes with him and he continually tells me that i need to force the kids to go with him but then when he takes Andrew to his house for his weekend visit which this weekend began at 3 pm on Saturday, he brings andrew home at 230pm on Sunday afternoon instead of keeping him until 6. So i am supposed to force them to go with him when he can't even force them to stay when they are with him??? If Don wont even keep them for the entire time he is supposed to have the kids, how am i supposed to force them to go with him in the first place?? It doesnt make any sense to me. Don continues to take Andrew on Friday night and brings him home first thing Saturday morning while he works, then doesn't show up to pick them back up until 7 pm Saturday night when he gets off work by or before 6pm. there is no winning with don. it's always his way or no way and it's always all my fault. but after what he told katelyn 2 years ago almost the exact words as he said thursday night when he told katelyn and this was said in court that is she wouldn't come out and see him he was never gonna do anything for her again. He has kept his word on that. he has never helped her since then and doesn't even get her a birthday card for her birthday. It's crazy how i predicted all this in court and all of it has happened just like i said it would. He showed up Friday morning to take the kids to school but only because Andrew continually asked him if he was going to but didnt even give andrew an answer to that question until friday morning. Well i gotta get some sleep will catch up more later. Goodnight
Don shows up at 615 to pick the kids up for his weekend. both the kids go out to his car to talk to him and to let him know they don't want to go with him. It was taking a long time so i finally went outside to see what was going on. Don was badgering them and yelling at them about going with him. They both repeatedly said they didn't want to go. Again, Katelyn hasn't been to her dads house for a weekend in years. To stop the yelling and arguing back and forth, I told the kids that if they were going with me (as i had to leave), then they needed to get in the car. After another few choice words by don he then said i will be by tomorow to pick you guys up. Saturday between 3 and 6 pm. they were both home at the time he came by around 315. I wasn't home, as i was working. He brought the Salina PD with them. I wasn't here to hear what was said or done but all i know is kodi said that don told the kids that if they didnt go with him i was going to jail. kodi came by my work to tell me that. Andrew went with him but katelyn still wouldnt go. So i told don by scaring the kids into going with him was not the answer to the problem that it was only going to make the situation worse. That he needed to grow up and find a different way to deal with this issue. you know we shouldn't have to wait at the house for 3 hours for him to show up to pick the kids up in the first place but we did. I made sure the kids were to stay home until dad showed up to pick them up. I went above and beyond what i need to do to make sure the kids are home at pickup time. So andrew goes with him and he continually tells me that i need to force the kids to go with him but then when he takes Andrew to his house for his weekend visit which this weekend began at 3 pm on Saturday, he brings andrew home at 230pm on Sunday afternoon instead of keeping him until 6. So i am supposed to force them to go with him when he can't even force them to stay when they are with him??? If Don wont even keep them for the entire time he is supposed to have the kids, how am i supposed to force them to go with him in the first place?? It doesnt make any sense to me. Don continues to take Andrew on Friday night and brings him home first thing Saturday morning while he works, then doesn't show up to pick them back up until 7 pm Saturday night when he gets off work by or before 6pm. there is no winning with don. it's always his way or no way and it's always all my fault. but after what he told katelyn 2 years ago almost the exact words as he said thursday night when he told katelyn and this was said in court that is she wouldn't come out and see him he was never gonna do anything for her again. He has kept his word on that. he has never helped her since then and doesn't even get her a birthday card for her birthday. It's crazy how i predicted all this in court and all of it has happened just like i said it would. He showed up Friday morning to take the kids to school but only because Andrew continually asked him if he was going to but didnt even give andrew an answer to that question until friday morning. Well i gotta get some sleep will catch up more later. Goodnight
Monday, February 28, 2011
More Visitation Issues
Thursday Feb. 24, 2011
Don was supposed to take the kids but neither wanted to go with him. When Andrew told him he said he was disappointed and his feelings were hurt. He said and i have this text " u and katelyn need to be here tonight... i dont get to see you two very often n i want to spend all the time i can with you, you both need to be here at 6." Andrew again told him he didnt feel good and didnt want to go anywhere and katelyn had gymnastics. Katelyn also told him she didnt want to go but then again she hasn't been to his house since christmas and before that it had been a year. I set up 2 lunch meetings with Don and katelyn to meet and have lunch to begin building a relationship and he no showed for both of them. the 1st time he said katelyn never called him to remind him and when i asked if he called her, he said no. I told him that he was the parent and he was supposed to be the responsible one and remember those things and call to remind her. The 2nd time I sent a letter to him, plus i texted him and emailed him the date and time and he used the excuse that i didnt call and remind him. When i told him i had emailed texted and sent a letter he claimed he never got it when in fact he had for sure because he replied to both the email and text messages. which again i have copies of. Then he said that he didn't recieve any of it but in fact he had because again he replied to atleast 2 of them. He proved to Katelyn that he doesnt really want to see her or spend time with her or interested in rebuilding a relationship. I believe the only reason he is still involved with the kids at this point is because he knows that the courts are still keeping an eye on the case. I say that because if he does take the kids he continues to bring them home early from visitation or not take them at all at times. Back to the 24th.
He then texts me the same thing he texts andrew. I told him it was between him and the kids not me. I try to stay out of all that. the kids are old enough to make up their minds about when they want to see him and when they dont. I still encourage a relationship, but they are so used to not seeing him very often so it doesnt bother them to be away from him for long periods of time. He then says to me "it is your responsibility as a parent to assure things are being done... u r supposed to have them both here by 6 i'm not playing games either they are here or will file a report everytime they aren't here as ordered by the court." I told him to do what he has to do and that andrew was now saying he didnt want to go for the weekend either and that he knows now why katelyn wont go with him. I also told don he was welcome to come by the house and see the kids which he did not do. He then proceeded to tell me that it "is ur responsibility to have the kids here by 6 so says the court. you know what will happen if they are not here. i'm no longer playing ur games any longer" However, I"m not playing games. This is between him and his kids not me. I just said ok. "if this was the only time this happened i wouldn't care so much however this is the 3rd time" (which i dont know where he gets that ) in the past few months he hasn't come out i've been understanding and patient tired of you not doing what your supposed to." Which i have been doing my part by taking the kids to his house and letting them decide to stay or not and also by encouraging them to go with an emotional and physical abusive father. Andrew told me again at 8pm thursday when i told him to tell his dad how he feels and i told him that he needed to sit down with his dad and talk to him about all this. He said " I cant" i asked why. he said"because dad gets mad and spanks me" i said because you tell him how you feel and he said "yes"
So the next thing that happens is the Salina PD call me and ask what's going on. I told them that the kids didn't want to go to their dads house. PD asked me if there was a court order that they were supposed to be there and I said yes that they go one night a week and every other weekend and the weekday is not a set day just that whatever works for everyone's schedule but of course with don its whatever works with his schedule and who cares about what everyone else has planned. PD told me that because i was not breaking any court order that he was gonna call don back which by the way don said he didnt have a court order for his visitations. How does he not have one? He was gonna tell don that i was not breaking any court order and if he wanted a specific night of the week he would have to take me back to court. That really pissed him off. He was absolutely livid about it and the next text reads " So you can prepare...I will no longer be taking the kids to school if they can't come out and spend time with me nor will I assist you with anything until u do as u should by bringing them out here n making sure they are home for me to pick them up as they are supposed to be. I will expect the kids to be ready to be picked up friday shortly after 6pm if not i will file a report again." I responded by telling him that i willl continue bringing them out and them being home when it is his visitation but i can't force them to go if they decide that they do not want to go. i will also continue to encourage. that statement was the same thing he said to katelyn 2 yrs ago when one time she wanted to spend the weekend with friends and he told her that he would never do anything for her again if she couldn't come out on his weekends. this is where the relationship with her dad dwindled. I reminded him that i expected him to take the kids and by telling me and the kids (which he told andrew he wouldn't be taking them to school either), that by doing that he was only showing the kids that he really didnt want to spend time with them as he was cutting out the 2 days a week that he was guaranteed to see his kids even if for a few minutes before school. I also told him that i would not longer support or encourage an abusive relationship where he was treating the kids like shit. I then again tried to give him a hand on what he is doing to the kids and how he hurts them and not me. I reminded him that we predicted that he would do that and that he should probably be discussing this with his kids and not with me because it affects them and not me. I dont care if he takes them to school or not it doesnt hurt my feelings if he doesn't but that it shows his kids alot and shows them he doesnt really want to spend extra time with them. I also reminded him thurs and fri was his responsibility. I told him he had only a little while before they are grown to make or break his relationship with the kids so he better pick and choose what he really wants to do. The next night is friday night.
Don was supposed to take the kids but neither wanted to go with him. When Andrew told him he said he was disappointed and his feelings were hurt. He said and i have this text " u and katelyn need to be here tonight... i dont get to see you two very often n i want to spend all the time i can with you, you both need to be here at 6." Andrew again told him he didnt feel good and didnt want to go anywhere and katelyn had gymnastics. Katelyn also told him she didnt want to go but then again she hasn't been to his house since christmas and before that it had been a year. I set up 2 lunch meetings with Don and katelyn to meet and have lunch to begin building a relationship and he no showed for both of them. the 1st time he said katelyn never called him to remind him and when i asked if he called her, he said no. I told him that he was the parent and he was supposed to be the responsible one and remember those things and call to remind her. The 2nd time I sent a letter to him, plus i texted him and emailed him the date and time and he used the excuse that i didnt call and remind him. When i told him i had emailed texted and sent a letter he claimed he never got it when in fact he had for sure because he replied to both the email and text messages. which again i have copies of. Then he said that he didn't recieve any of it but in fact he had because again he replied to atleast 2 of them. He proved to Katelyn that he doesnt really want to see her or spend time with her or interested in rebuilding a relationship. I believe the only reason he is still involved with the kids at this point is because he knows that the courts are still keeping an eye on the case. I say that because if he does take the kids he continues to bring them home early from visitation or not take them at all at times. Back to the 24th.
He then texts me the same thing he texts andrew. I told him it was between him and the kids not me. I try to stay out of all that. the kids are old enough to make up their minds about when they want to see him and when they dont. I still encourage a relationship, but they are so used to not seeing him very often so it doesnt bother them to be away from him for long periods of time. He then says to me "it is your responsibility as a parent to assure things are being done... u r supposed to have them both here by 6 i'm not playing games either they are here or will file a report everytime they aren't here as ordered by the court." I told him to do what he has to do and that andrew was now saying he didnt want to go for the weekend either and that he knows now why katelyn wont go with him. I also told don he was welcome to come by the house and see the kids which he did not do. He then proceeded to tell me that it "is ur responsibility to have the kids here by 6 so says the court. you know what will happen if they are not here. i'm no longer playing ur games any longer" However, I"m not playing games. This is between him and his kids not me. I just said ok. "if this was the only time this happened i wouldn't care so much however this is the 3rd time" (which i dont know where he gets that ) in the past few months he hasn't come out i've been understanding and patient tired of you not doing what your supposed to." Which i have been doing my part by taking the kids to his house and letting them decide to stay or not and also by encouraging them to go with an emotional and physical abusive father. Andrew told me again at 8pm thursday when i told him to tell his dad how he feels and i told him that he needed to sit down with his dad and talk to him about all this. He said " I cant" i asked why. he said"because dad gets mad and spanks me" i said because you tell him how you feel and he said "yes"
So the next thing that happens is the Salina PD call me and ask what's going on. I told them that the kids didn't want to go to their dads house. PD asked me if there was a court order that they were supposed to be there and I said yes that they go one night a week and every other weekend and the weekday is not a set day just that whatever works for everyone's schedule but of course with don its whatever works with his schedule and who cares about what everyone else has planned. PD told me that because i was not breaking any court order that he was gonna call don back which by the way don said he didnt have a court order for his visitations. How does he not have one? He was gonna tell don that i was not breaking any court order and if he wanted a specific night of the week he would have to take me back to court. That really pissed him off. He was absolutely livid about it and the next text reads " So you can prepare...I will no longer be taking the kids to school if they can't come out and spend time with me nor will I assist you with anything until u do as u should by bringing them out here n making sure they are home for me to pick them up as they are supposed to be. I will expect the kids to be ready to be picked up friday shortly after 6pm if not i will file a report again." I responded by telling him that i willl continue bringing them out and them being home when it is his visitation but i can't force them to go if they decide that they do not want to go. i will also continue to encourage. that statement was the same thing he said to katelyn 2 yrs ago when one time she wanted to spend the weekend with friends and he told her that he would never do anything for her again if she couldn't come out on his weekends. this is where the relationship with her dad dwindled. I reminded him that i expected him to take the kids and by telling me and the kids (which he told andrew he wouldn't be taking them to school either), that by doing that he was only showing the kids that he really didnt want to spend time with them as he was cutting out the 2 days a week that he was guaranteed to see his kids even if for a few minutes before school. I also told him that i would not longer support or encourage an abusive relationship where he was treating the kids like shit. I then again tried to give him a hand on what he is doing to the kids and how he hurts them and not me. I reminded him that we predicted that he would do that and that he should probably be discussing this with his kids and not with me because it affects them and not me. I dont care if he takes them to school or not it doesnt hurt my feelings if he doesn't but that it shows his kids alot and shows them he doesnt really want to spend extra time with them. I also reminded him thurs and fri was his responsibility. I told him he had only a little while before they are grown to make or break his relationship with the kids so he better pick and choose what he really wants to do. The next night is friday night.
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